EVIL NUN (DVD)
2025 / 90 min
Review by Josey, the Sudden Cat🙀
For a fleeting moment, Evil Nun got my hopes up with its genuinely disturbing prologue, which has a nun crouched on a church floor, screaming in blood-curdling agony while in labor. After she gives birth, a dark-robed figure takes her baby away, then brains her with a hammer. It’s a scene more unnerving than anything in The Nun, the inexplicably popular film that mockbuster masters The Asylum are obviously ripping off.
Then the moment’s over, and the story itself starts with yet-another carload of young people who get stranded. And I gotta say…few things kill my enthusiasm for a horror movie faster than one that opens with a batch o’ kids stuck in the middle of nowhere. It’s one of the most overused horror tropes in history and the kids are always the same, which is indicative of a complete indifference to offering anything original.
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| When all else fails, shine the flashlight directly at your own face. |
But I get it. Originality has never been The Asylum’s modus operandi, so why start now? And admittedly, they’ve managed to crank out a few that are genuinely entertaining (if sometimes at their own expense). Not this time, however. The plot eventually has its characters trapped in the same church where the nun from the prologue died. Then they start getting picked off by an unseen entity…but not the nun herself, who instead “possesses” one of the girls, imploring her and her dwindling group of friends to find her missing baby. That’s right, kids…despite the misleading title, there is no evil nun (unless you count her being knocked up in the first place). But that’s the least of the movie’s problems. While performances are serviceable, a few of the kills are okay and the film is competently made, the story and characters are hopelessly generic. Since it doesn’t even qualify as so-bad-it’s-good, Evil Nun ends up committing the ultimate sin of being boring and forgettable.
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