KILLDOZER and the Dream Job

KILLDOZER (1974)

Starring Clint Walker, Carl Betz, Neville Brand, James Wainwright, Robert Urich, James A. Watson Jr. Directed by Jerry London. (74 min)

Essay by D.M. ANDERSON💀

So my wife, Francie, and I were out running errands when she half-jokingly suggested we get licensed to operate bulldozers and offer our services to people or businesses who might need stuff moved. 

Though I’m semi-retired and living fairly comfortably, I replied, “How much does a bulldozer actually cost?” 

“We wouldn’t buy one,” she countered. “We’d just drive them.”

While I don’t know if that’s how the business actually works, the idea of a husband & wife bulldozing team actually sounded kinda cool. But exactly how does one become a bulldozer driver? “Are there bulldozer schools or something?”

“There has to be,” Francie said. “They don’t let just anybody drive one.”

I briefly thought of telling her about the time when I was a kid and wandered into an unattended construction area. It was the weekend, so nobody was working and all the heavy duty equipment was parked wherever their operators’ shift ended on Friday. Like snoozing giants, a couple of big yellow dozers laid dormant nearby, too tempting to resist going in for a closer inspection. After climbing into the cab of the closest one, I started moving levers and pushing buttons, and to my utter terror, the damn thing lurched and roared to life. 

Practically pissing myself, I leaped down, jumped on my bike and sped away, leaving the growling beast behind, my active imagination entertaining the notion that it might come after me…angry that I woke it from its weekend slumber. Even a quarter mile away, I could still hear it roaring and briefly considered returning to the scene of the crime to try and shut it down. But hell, I wasn’t sure exactly how I started it in the first place. No…best to scamper away unseen, and having just seen Killdozer on TV, I had no further desire to incur the machine’s wrath.

While that dozer debacle instilled me with a healthy respect for them, it now seemed plausible that, with a little hands-on training under my belt, I could master their awesome power in order to push shit around (or knock it over) for a living. With the wife, of course.

“We could call our business Gettin’ Dirty with Dave & Francie,” I said suggestively.

Francie cackled, “Call us if you want the earth moved.” Even at our age, we often revert back to being twelve-year-olds when no one else is around…or when we feel like embarrassing our daughters.

“You know what else we could do? We could go to random houses with our machine and tell them that for only $10,000, we’ll pass by their house and knock over someone else's.”

“That’s extortion.”

“I prefer to think of it as holding the house for ransom.” 

Either way, a big honkin’ bulldozer could be a badass way to make a living, especially for a guy who’s never been particularly badass himself (or remotely intimidating). But sitting in the cab of one of these bad boys, revving the engine with delirious grin spread across my face? Hell, I might simply be content to prowl around peaceful neighborhood streets in the dead of night, unseen behind the mechanical monster’s probing headlights as I repeatedly raised and lowered its massive blade. The predatory possibilities are endless. They were endless to Theodore Sturgeon, too, who wrote the story, Killdozer, back in 1944, which was later loosely adapted into a goofy ABC Movie of the Week.

There’s an entire generation of children raised in the ‘70s - including myself - whose introduction to horror and sci-fi was through television. We were old enough to be curious about the monsters lurking in theaters but mostly too young to do anything about it, so networks stepped in to oblige us by cranking out all kinds of creepy concoctions. The primary purveyor of these pictures was ABC, whose Movie of the Week series was a staple throughout the decade. Most movies were simply schedule filler and not particularly memorable, but some, like The Night Stalker and Trilogy of Terror, transcended their TV origins (and production values) to become classics. 

Those of us who grew up on such televised terrors are in our 50s and 60s now, so the likes of Killdozer, The Stranger Within and Bad Ronald still hold special places in our hearts. Almost without exception, they seem comparatively quaint today and never as scary as we remembered, but revisiting them stirs-up a lot of nostalgic warm fuzzies.

Actually, Killdozer wasn’t scary back then either. Even as a 10-year-old, tuning in one February Saturday night in 1974, I knew the very premise (to say nothing of the title) was inherently stupid, yet irresistible at the same time. That might make it sort-of the Sharknado of its day, save for one thing: The tone is completely serious.

In the movie, a meteor strikes a remote island and becomes buried over time. It’s later discovered by a construction crew led by Lloyd Kelly (Clint Walker). Not willing to let a glowing space rock stand in the way of progress, they decide to try and push it aside with a large bulldozer. However, the meteor’s power affects the machine, making it uncontrollable. 

The possessed bulldozer commences stalking the construction crew all over the island, hellbent on killing them all. Much silliness ensues, all unintentional, but there’s some great fun to be found in watching a team of guys trying to outwit their own construction equipment. And admittedly, there are a few moments when director Jerry London manages to make the dozer kind of menacing, especially during the night sequences. 

Considering the concept, the movie also features earnest performances, which had to be difficult to pull off with a straight face. Walker’s probably the most famous name here, though old school western fans will certainly recognize career bad guy Neville Brand. And isn’t that the late, great TV legend Robert Urich in an early role (and first to die)?

How to properly dispose of a Cybertruck.

As sentient, vicious vehicles go, Killdozer actually predates the likes of The Car, Crash!, Christine and Maximum Overdrive. While it’s not necessarily better than those films (okay, it’s way better than Maximum Overdrive), one can’t help but wonder if this quaint little TV flick had at least some influence (on Stephen King in particular, who wrote a lot about machines turning on their masters). Over the years, it’s also become something of a cult film, even inspiring a band name.

Unfortunately, after Francie and I finished our errands, I did a quick Google and learned that even a medium sized CAT bulldozer (which is evidently the Ferrari of construction equipment) runs well over $100,000. Really large ones, like the malevolent machine in Killdozer, could cost as much as a million bucks. So I guess if Francie and I are gonna start our earth-moving/extortion side hustle, it’ll be as hired hands using someone else’s stuff.

On the plus side, it turns out there is such a thing as bulldozer school. In fact, we could be qualified to sit in the cab of a 55 ton killing machine in just a couple of weeks. Yours truly even passed the pre-qualification test with an 82%. Consider yourselves warned.

Looking Back at EARTH II

EARTH II (Blu-ray)

1971 / 97 min

From Warner Archive Collection

Available at www.MovieZyng.com

Review by Mr. Paws😺

In addition to bringing hundreds of old classics to Blu-ray, Warner Archive seems well aware of an entire generation who grew up on made-for-TV movies of the 1970s. Some of this writer’s first exposure to horror, science-fiction and thrillers came courtesy of the ABC Movie of the Week and CBS Tuesday Night Movies.

One of them I vaguely recall is Earth II. Like such similar TV movies from the era as Genesis II and The Questor Tapes, it was originally produced as the pilot episode for a potential series, but never found an audience. As a kid with a growing interest in science-fiction, I remember tuning in to watch it, but almost nothing about the actual plot

Revisiting Earth II on Blu-ray was an interesting experience. The special effects and space sequences that kept me glued to the set when I was eight years old are obviously antiquated, but an enjoyable trip down memory lane nevertheless. Conversely, having remembered nothing about the story beyond the basic premise, much of the film felt completely new to me.

Earth II is an orbiting space station (predating the ISS) that is declared a sovereign nation with its own democratic government, so committed to peace that even toy guns are forbidden. Though commanded by David Seville (Gary Lockwood), all decisions affecting its thousands of citizens are voted on by everyone. This idyllic existence is threatened when the Chinese park an orbiting nuclear weapon nearby, threatening war if anyone tinkers with it.

Gary suddenly realizes how much he misses Stanley Kubrick.

David wants to leave it alone, but goaded by hawkish new arrival Frank Karger (Anthony Franciosa), the citizens vote to capture the bomb and deactivate it. But Frank wants to go one step further and keep the bomb to make Earth II a nuclear superpower, to the chagrin of his distraught wife, Lisa (Mariette Hartley), who wants to keep the station a peaceful society to raise their son. So she launches the weapon, thinking it will fly into the sun (which was originally suggested by David). Instead, it heads toward Earth. So now David and his team must retrieve and disarm the bomb, which is growing increasingly unstable.

Conceptually, I can see how Earth II could’ve been a decent series (if somewhat short-lived, like most sci-fi shows of the era). Though not particularly thrilling, the movie’s teleplay is pretty well written and occasionally thought provoking. With a cast consisting primarily of television actors, the overall performances are decent. And despite obviously being created with future episodes in mind, the pilot works well enough as a standalone story.

Of course, the primary appeal of Earth II today is purely nostalgic. Its quaint ‘70s aesthetic and TV origins would probably be lost on anyone who didn’t grow up with this stuff. For those who did - like yours truly - watching this is an agreeable look back at a bygone era of TV science-fiction.

Rediscovering HOUSE M.D.

HOUSE M.D. - THE COMPLETE SERIES (Blu-ray)

2004-2002 / 7765 min

From Universal

Available at www.MovieZyng.com

Review by Stinky’s Mom😺

Funnily enough, I had started my House journey right before the Complete Series came out. I was too young to appreciate House during the height of its popularity, preferring to spend my weekday evenings watching Spongebob with my finger up my nose. Now, as an adult, I quite enjoy watching House, ‘hmming’ and ‘oh, of course’-ing at it and pretending like I’m finally getting use out of my biology degree by keeping up with each new diagnosis. 

House ran on Fox for eight seasons between 2004 and 2012. It features the titular Dr. House (Hugh Laurie), a great doctor who is also the most insufferable man you’ll ever meet. Each episode features House and his gaggle of doctors diagnosing and treating patients, committing insane medical malpractice along the way. Each episode is approached like a mystery, with twists and incorrect diagnoses before a solution can ever be landed on, but it never wears out its welcome even as it veers towards being formulaic. 

The Complete Series features all 177 episodes, plus bonus features on Blu-Ray. Each season has its own section of special features, although not all seasons are created equal. Season one features what looks like mostly old promotional material, with grainy, crunchy quality to boot. Later seasons have things like music videos, episode commentaies, and blooper reels (thank God…why have special features without a blooper reel?). The quality on most of these special features seems lower than the picture quality of the episodes, and look like they were probably just nabbed from past releases of seasons. 

Hugh feigns interest in Robert's cat pix.

The episodes themselves mostly look great on Blu-Ray. Most shots even from the first season look like something that could be on TV today. There were a few exceptions though, where oddly enough, a few shots looked a bit pixelated and grainy. It wasn’t enough to diminish my enjoyment of the series, especially as a fan, but it was at least noticeable. 

It's a nice collection of a great series and a better alternative to streaming, where an hour long episode is interrupted by commercials. I was thrilled to have it to finish my binge of the series. However, this collection doesn’t necessarily add anything worth having if you’ve already got access to the series through past releases or if you’re already spending money on ad-free streaming. 

EXTRA KIBBLES

SEASON 1 - Dr. House Medical Cases; The Concept; Set Tour; House-isms; Casting Session with Hugh Laurie.

SEASON 2 - An Evening with House; Blooper Reel; Alternate Takes: The Valley Girl Versions; In Could Be Lupus…; Producer Audio Commentaries.

SEASON 3 - Soundtrack Sessions; Anatomy of an Episode: The Jerk; Blood, Needles and Body Parts: The House Prop Department; Open House: The Production Office; Blooper Reel; Audio Commentary.

SEASON 4 - House’s Soup: Prescription Passion; New Beginnings; Meet the Writers; The Visual Effects of House; My Favorite Episode So Far…; House’s Head Audio Commentary (by exec producers David Shore &  Katie Jacobs.

SEASON 5 - House Meets a Milestone: The 1000th Episode; Keeping it Real: Accuracy in Writing; Dr. Mom: Cuddy’s Storyline; House Guests: Casting the Show; Audio Commentary (by exec producer David Foster and writers Russel Friend & Garrett Lerner.

SEASON 6 - Before Broken (this is an original, unscripted short film with actor Hugh Laurie); A Different POV: Hugh Laurie Directs; New Faces in a New House; Various Episode Commentaries.

SEASON 7 - Meet Martha Masters; Huddy Dissected ( a look at House & Cuddy’s relationship); Anatomy of an Episode: Bombshells; Thirteen Returns (the return of Dr. Hadley to the series); Various Episode Commentaries.

SEASON 8 - House M.D. Swan Song; The Doctor Directs: Behind the Scenes with Hugh Laurie; Everybody Dies: A Postmortem (about the series finale).

SEPTEMBER 5: A Tragic Event From A Unique Perspective

SEPTEMBER 5 (Blu-ray)

2024 / 94 min

From Paramount

Review by Stinky the Destroyer😺

Being of a certain age, I have a (very) vague recollection of the Munich Massacre casting a dark shadow over the 1972 Olympics. But at the time, I was too young to comprehend that these events were unfolding live on television…and simply because ABC happened to be there for sports coverage. 

For those unaware, on September 5, the terrorist organization known as Black September entered the Olympic village, taking several Israeli athletes and coaches hostage and demanding the release of hundreds of Palestine prisoners. During the course of that day, there were negotiations and failed rescue attempts, and ultimately, everything ended with the deaths of all 11 hostages.

The tragedy has been the subject of numerous movies and television shows before (most notably, Steven Spielberg’s Munich), but September 5 is cut from different cloth. Less focused on the particulars of the terror attack itself, the film is a dramatic reenactment of ABC’s coverage behind the scenes. As such, it brilliantly achieves an urgent, chaotic tone not unlike United 93, exacerbated by superior editing that should’ve gotten an Oscar nomination. 

"You're asking for a raise now?"

As depicted here, coverage begins with ABC Sports president Roone Arledge (Peter Sarsgaard) refusing to turn the developing story over to the network’s more experienced news division, stating his team is already on location and able to broadcast live. We feel like a fly on the wall, watching barely controlled chaos as the coverage is often complicated by conflict, miscommunication, ethically questionable decisions and occasional overreaching ambition. 

Being the most recognizable member of the cast, I suppose Sarsgaard could be considered the de facto main character. But really, September 5 is an ensemble piece, its primary players being ambitious control room leader Geoffrey Mason (John Magaro), German translator Marriane Gebhardt (Leonie Benesch) and head-of-operations Marvin Bader (Ben Chaplin), the last of whom sort-of serves as the film’s moral compass, sharply contrasting Arledge and Mason’s competitive drive for exclusive coverage. We may not always condone some of these characters’ attitudes or actions, but we certainly understand them and they’re undeniably compelling

The film is mostly devoid of onscreen antagonists (the terrorists are only seen from a distance). The entire narrative is from the point-of-view of those doing the broadcast, with the ongoing event itself presented primarily through archival broadcast footage. With his sci-fi/horror background, director/co-writer Tim Fehlbaum has seemingly come out of nowhere to put together a tense, fast-paced thriller that presents a tragic event from a unique perspective. Though nominated for a Best Screenplay Oscar, how September 5 was largely ignored by the Academy while Emelia Perez racked up 13 nominations is a complete mystery.