October 17, 2020

Unwrap This SCARE PACKAGE

SCARE PACKAGE (Blu-ray Review)
2020 / 107 min

From RLJE FILMS

Review by Josey, the Sudden Cat🙀

After finishing Scare Package with my daughter, Lucy, she simply said, “Wow, that was completely insane from start to finish.” In other words, she liked it a lot. So did I. 

Produced on an obviously limited budget, what it lacks in polish is compensated by sheer exuberance and audacity. Horror anthologies are always a risky endeavor and most end up being wildly inconsistent. But not-only does Scare Package feature far more hits than misses, the whole thing is generally played for laughs. And for the most part, it earns them.


Sure, poking fun at horror tropes is kind-of like shooting fish in a barrel, but it’s clear the legions of writers, directors and producers who put this together have a lot of love for the genre. In a way, that sincerity - backed by some pretty clever writing - is what makes the film so constantly amusing. 


There are seven stories counting the framing device, which centers around an old video store run by horror buff “Rad” Chad (Jeremy King), who runs his mouth non-stop as he trains a new clerk, Hawn (Hawn Tran), and puts up with obnoxious regular customer, Sam (Bryon Brown). Their banter and bickering between segments is generally pretty damn funny. Then unexpectedly, the framing device becomes the final story, a climax that turns into the ultimate meta-movie and features a welcome cameo by Joe Bob Briggs.


For the most part, the stories in-between are just as amusing and the film even has an opening act, so to speak. Appropriately titled “Cold Open,” it features a guy who laments his job as the minor character who sets the stage for horror then disappears from the rest of the film (which he actually ends up doing). Other stories send-up various subgenres, such as body horror, werewolves, possession films and, of course, slasher movies. The wonderfully-titled “The Night He Came Back Again, Part IV: The Final Kill” is a hilarious parody of the unkillable killer and the film's best segment.


"Wanna see my sex tape?"

There’s even room for satiric targets unrelated to horror, such as nerds, TV binge-watchers and the toxic masculinity seen in films like Fight Club. The only real clunker in the bunch is “Girls Night Out of Body,” which has three ladies who turn into monsters after sharing a forbidden lollipop. It’s also the only story that isn’t blatantly comedic in tone.


Elsewhere, the gags & gore come fast and furious. Sometimes the dialogue is juvenile, but more often than not, it’s deceptively clever and often laugh-out-loud funny. The same could be said about the performances, which range from amateurish to spot-on. King, in particular, is hilarious, which is a good thing since his character is essentially the glue that holds everything together, especially during the final story. And subtle, the film ain’t, especially in the bloodletting department. The violence is so over-the-top that it becomes part of the humor, much like Peter Jackson’s early horror comedies.


All too often, movies this self-aware end up being too enamored with themselves, like someone in love with the smell of their own farts. However, Scare Package never plays like it’s superior to the genre it’s having fun with. There’s a earnestness to it that’s as endearing as it is amusing. With a charming (and appropriate) ‘80s aesthetic, this may not be the best horror film I’ve seen this year, but it’s certainly the funniest.


EXTRA KIBBLES

THE LAST DRIVE-IN WITH JOE BOB BRIGGS EPISODE - Watch Scare Package the way it premiered on Brigg’s Shudder series.

“LOCKER ROOM Z” - Another story that wasn’t included in the final cut. Too bad. It’s actually pretty good.

“RAD CHAD’S RAD AD” - Faux commercial for Rad Chad’s video store.

“ORIGINAL ‘NOT-AS-GOOD’ ENDING” - They’re right.

BLOOPER REEL

AUDIO COMMENTARY - writer/director/producer Aaron B. Koontz and writer Cameron Burns

SHUDDER TRIAL OFFER

KITTY CONSENSUS:

PURR-R-R...LIKE A GOOD SCRATCH BEHIND THE EARS.

October 16, 2020

THE HAUNTING (Paramount Presents #10): A Pretty Seashell

THE HAUNTING (Blu-ray Review)
1999 / 112 min

From PARAMOUNT

Review by Josey, the Sudden Cat🙀

The Haunting is an odd choice for the Paramount Presents series (#10, for those of you collecting them). It made box office bank, but was hardly a blockbuster or critical darling. It doesn’t enjoy the classic status of previous films in the series, even on a cult level. There are plenty of other movies from the same era that could better represent Paramount’s legacy.

And if you want to get technical, it wasn't even produced or released by Paramount Pictures. The Haunting was actually an early Dreamworks production, a studio Paramount didn’t own until 2006. On the other hand, this is the first time The Haunting has been released on Blu-ray, which probably trumps my nitpicking. After all, the film must have its share of fans, right? 


Right?


Well, I know of one fan, for sure. My wife loves this film. She’s never been what you’d call a big horror lover and the few she does enjoy tend to be fairly benign in the scare department, with only light violence and even lighter themes. In other words, the kind of movie that won't linger in her head while she’s trying to sleep.


The Haunting checks-off all those boxes...a big, flashy major-studio effort with the best CGI money can buy and an attractive cast (plus Bruce Dern) who normally wouldn’t be caught dead doing a horror film. But despite the presence of Liam Neeson, Lili Taylor, the lovely Catherine Zeta-Jones and the always-obnoxious Owen Wilson, their characters are just talking heads. The real stars of the film are the special effects and production design.


When Owen Wilson sleeps nude.
And indeed, The Haunting is constantly interesting to look at. Hill House, a labyrinthine mansion where Dr. Marrow (Neeson) conducts his “fear” experiment, is the most engaging character in the film, with intricate wood carvings in every nook & cranny, cavernous rooms and menacing statues. With the help of elaborate (for the time) CGI, Hill House is practically a living entity.

But as a lot of fright fans will attest, horror and CGI often get along like oil and water. Effectively using CGI in horror is a challenge even today, let-alone 21 years ago. Here, the special effects overwhelm the story - a lukewarm rehash of Shirley Jackson’s novel - and at no point are they really convincing. Hence, there isn’t a single moment that’s remotely scary, or even unsettling.


The Haunting is a lot like a gift shop seashell...elaborately designed, polished to a glistening sheen and very pretty to look at - especially on Blu-ray - but still empty inside. We’re impressed with the production design and maybe even able to enjoy the special effects in the context of when they were created, but it’s ultimately best appreciated by people like my wife. When it comes to horror, she’ll dip her toe in the water now and then, but isn't truly looking to be scared.


EXTRA KIBBLES

FILMMAKER FOCUS - A new interview with director Jan de Bont

FEATURETTE - A vintage behind-the-scenes promotional documentary hosted by Catherine Zeta-Jones

2 TRAILERS

DIGITAL COPY

KITTY CONSENSUS:

NOT BAD. BECAUSE MY WIFE LIKES IT.

Rest in Peace, Rhonda Fleming


October 14, 2020

THE OWNERS and a Bit of Title Trouble

THE OWNERS (Blu-ray Review)
2020 / 92 min

From RLJE FILMS

Review by Josey, the Sudden Cat🙀

The Owners is an impressive slab of psychological horror with a good premise, solid performances and a lot of tightly-wound suspense. Some of that tension, however, is sort-of undermined by the title. Not that it’s terrible, but it does tend to spoil the surprise at who the real villains are.

In a story of bad guys vs. worse guys, Gaz, Nathan and Terry are three bumbling thugs who plan to rob a safe inside a massive country mansion while the owners are away. Nathan’s beleaguered girlfriend, Mary (Masie Williams), wants nothing to do with the robbery, but gets coerced into sticking around because she has the only car. Unable to open the safe, they decide to wait for the owners and force the combination out of them.


Those owners are Dr. Huggins (Sylvester McCoy) and his wife, Ellen (Rita Tushingham), a kindly old couple that Gaz is willing to torture to get the combination. However, the others actually know the Hugginses and are reluctant to go that far. The best scene in the entire film happens in the basement (where the safe is). Gaz is dangerously psychotic, stabbing Nathan during a fight. But just as he’s about to kill Ellen, Maisie bludgeons him to death with a sledgehammer, saving everybody.


"These are my stalking stockings."
However, Dr. Huggins and Ellen aren’t quite as helpless as they seem and the real torment has just begun. Maintaining a ruse of being helpful and sympathetic, Dr. Huggins slowly turns the tables on them in ways that would be unfair to reveal here. Sure, the title more-or-less has us suspecting something sinister about the Hugginses before we even see them, but there are still plenty of narrative surprises and well-timed shocks. While the performances are all good, McCoy totally steals the film, never breaking the character’s kindly demeanor even after his motives and secrets become known. In fact, his joviality actually enhances the menace.

The conclusion might infuriate a few viewers, though it’s certainly effective. Elsewhere, The Owners is a lot of fun, with a compelling story, interesting characters and tension-filled sequences. Too bad the title gives away the film’s biggest surprise, but that’s a minor quip.


EXTRA KIBBLES

FEATURETTE - “The Making of The Owners


KITTY CONSENSUS:

PURR-R-R...LIKE A GOOD SCRATCH BEHIND THE EARS.

October 13, 2020

BLACK WATER: ABYSS and the Soft Spot

BLACK WATER: ABYSS (Blu-ray Review)
2020 / 98 min

From SCREEN MEDIA

Review by Tiger the Terrible😽

I have a soft spot for killer critter movies - even a lot of the bad ones - so forgive me if I give Black Water: Abyss a more generous review than some might think it warrants. This is a horror subgenre so rife with bargain basement buffoonery that when I come across one which is put together pretty well, it’s hard not to view it favorably.

The film is a sequel to 2007’s Black Water, which I’ve never seen, but don’t fret if you haven't either. Aside from the director and another ravenous reptile, it’s an all new story with different characters. Five standard-issue twentysomethngs go spelunking in a deep underground cave. When a sudden storm causes flash flooding, they find themselves trapped. Making matters worse is the killer crocodile that’s down there with them. Or maybe several; the film doesn’t make it quite clear. If there is just one, he gets around this labyrinthine cave pretty damned fast,. On the other hand, all that exercise might explain his massive appetite.


Guess who's about to own this round of Marco Polo.
But hey, Black Water: Abyss ain’t a documentary. It ain’t much of an ensemble piece, either. Aside from a late-inning bit of manufactured drama, character exposition is fairly minimal. We neither like nor dislike any of these kids. And that’s perfectly okay because most of ‘em are just croc fodder anyway. As such, the film delivers the goods, wasting little time getting to the animal action and even generating several moments of claustrophobic suspense. While gorehounds might be disappointed in the lack of on-screen bloodletting, the special effects are decent considering the budget. Wisely shown in only brief glimpses, the croc is more-or-less convincing.

Anchored by a chuckle-worthy false ending, Black Water: Abyss is no Jaws, nor is it as much outrageous fun as Crawl. Still, the film is a solid no-frills creature feature...well made, fast paced and entertaining. That’s more than I can say about most movies featuring ragin’ reptiles. Then again, I've always had a soft spot for these things.

KITTY CONSENSUS:

PURR-R-R...LIKE A GOOD SCRATCH BEHIND THE EARS.

THE POOP SCOOP: Cats, Dogs & Creatures of the Night


Exclusive Video On The Evolution of Cats & Dogs
Cats & Dogs 3: Paws Unite - Now available on Digital, Blu-ray & DVD. You can officially get your paws on your very own copy of Cats & Dogs 3: Paws Unite! on Blu-ray Combo Pack & DVD from Warner Bros. Home Entertainment. In honor of this highly anticipated release – we just got in a spyware themed supercut from all three Cats & Dogs movies - exclusively made for this all-new original movie!

About Cats & Dogs 3: Paws Unite!

It's been 10 years since the creation of the Great Truce, an elaborate joint-species surveillance system designed and monitored by cats and dogs to keep the peace when conflicts arise. But when a tech-savvy villain hacks into wireless networks to use frequencies only heard by cats and dogs, he manipulates them into conflict, and the worldwide battle between cats and dogs is BACK ON. Now, a team of inexperienced and untested agents will have to use their old-school animal instincts to restore order and peace between cats and dogs everywhere.

 

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NEW TRAILER: SPELL, starring Omari Hardwick, Loretta Devine and more!
IN SELECT THEATERS, ON-DEMAND and DIGITAL PURCHASE 10/30

Omari Hardwick (“Power,” Sorry to Bother You), Loretta Devine (“Black-ish,” Crash) and John Beasley (The Sum of All Fears, The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks) star in the terrifying thriller SPELL, coming to Premium Video-On-Demand and Digital in time for Halloween on October 30 from Paramount Home Entertainment.

 

SYNOPSIS | While flying to his father’s funeral in rural Appalachia, an intense storm causes Marquis (Omari Hardwick) to lose control of the plane carrying him and his family.  He awakens wounded, alone and trapped in Ms. Eloise’s (Loretta Devine) attic, who claims she can nurse him back to health with the Boogity, a Hoodoo figure she has made from his blood and skin. Unable to call for help, Marquis desperately tries to outwit and break free from her dark magic and save his family from a sinister ritual before the rise of the blood moon.

 

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BLADE on 4K Ultra HD Blu-ray Combo Pack and Digital 12/1
Directed by Stephen Norrington (The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen) and written by David S. Goyer (The Dark Knight trilogy), the film stars Wesley Snipes and the half-vampire, half-human vampire hunter Blade, Stephen Dorff, Kris Kristofferson, N’Bushe Wright, Donal Logue, Udo Kier, and Sanaa Lathan. Blade was produced by Peter Frankfurt, Wesley Snipes, and Robert Engelman, and is based on the Marvel “Blade” created by Marv Wolfman and Gene Colan. Ultra HD* showcases 4K resolution with High Dynamic Range (HDR) and a wider color spectrum, offering consumers brighter, deeper, more lifelike colors for a home entertainment viewing experience like never before. 

MORTAL on Digital, On Demand 11/6 and Blu-ray and DVD 11/10
Dive into a thrilling tale when Mortal arrives on Digital and On Demand November 6th, and on Blu-ray (plus Digital) and DVD November 10th from Lionsgate. From critically acclaimed director André Øvredal (Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, Trollhunter), executive produced by Academy Award® nominee Fred Berger (2016, Best Picture, La La Land), the film stars Nat Wolff, Priyanka Bose, and Iben Akerlie. In this spellbinding thriller, a sleepy Norwegian town erupts after an American backpacker is arrested. Witnesses claim a teen died after touching the stranger, and that he inexplicably started a fire that engulfed a farm. He warns a psychologist, Christine, that he has supernatural powers, and that anyone who gets too close to him dies. Is he a liar, a freak of nature, an angry god? Determined to find the truth, Christine draws nearer, and what she finds is beyond her wildest imaginings…

October 11, 2020

REVERSAL OF FORTUNE Leaves a Scar

REVERSAL OF FORTUNE (Blu-ray Review)
1990 / 112 min

From WARNER ARCHIVE COLLECTION

Review by Mr. Paws

There’s a good chance Jeremy Iron’s legacy will be defined by Reversal of Fortune and, to a lesser extent, The Lion King. Not to take away from his impressive body of work on both stage and screen, but his performances in these two films left an indelible mark on popular culture. And as it happens, they are irrevocably linked. 

Irons’ voice-work in The Lion King made Scar one of Disney’s most memorable Disney villains. Yet the Scar we know and hate wouldn’t exist if not for Irons’ Oscar winning portrayal of Claus von Bulow in Reversal of Fortune. It’s no secret that Simba’s conniving uncle is an exaggerated homage, right down to copping one of Irons’ most memorable lines as an in-joke (“You have no idea”).


Since the outcome is a given, it’s the strength of the performances that make Reversal of Fortune worth watching. What’s sort-of ironic is even though it’s well established that Claus von Bulow was almost universally hated after being found guilty for killing his wealthy wife, Sunny (Glenn Close), Irons manages to make him an almost sympathetic character, at-least compared to her. The film’s unreliable narrator, Sunny is in a coma - which she never awakens from - at the beginning of the film. But through flashbacks, the film paints her as a vindictive, selfish, high-maintenance, suicidal addict. 


"Uh...line..."
Beleaguered as he may be, Claus may very well be guilty, but the lawyer he hires to write an appeal, Alan Dershowitz (Ron Silver), certainly earns his fee by planting seeds of doubt over the original verdict. With an abrasive personality, Alan’s not all that likable either. Then again, neither was the real Dershowitz, meaning Silver plays him perfectly.

Reversal of Fortune has no real heroes or villains, nor is the narrative all that revelatory. It’s a film driven almost entirely by the three lead performances, and as such, remains enjoyable and engaging, despite the outcome being a foregone conclusion. If nothing else, it’s amusing to see where the inspiration for Scar came from.


EXTRA KIBBLES

AUDIO COMMENTARY - By director Barbet Schroeder and screenwriter Nicholas Kazan


KITTY CONSENSUS:

PURR-R-R...LIKE A GOOD SCRATCH BEHIND THE EARS.

October 10, 2020

STAR TREK: PICARD - SEASON ONE: Old Dog, New Tricks

STAR TREK: PICARD - SEASON ONE (Blu-ray Review)
2020 / 488 min (10 episodes)

From PARAMOUNT

Review by Cuddles, the Coach Potato😹

Think back to some of Star Trek: The Next Generation’s best episodes, the ones which have the most intriguing stories, terrific character exposition and a far-reaching impact on the direction later seasons - as well as the subsequent movies - would take. Picard plays like one of those classic episodes, only it happens to be eight hours long. It’s also the best Star Trek series since TNG

Picard certainly remembers the past, but doesn’t appear concerned with whether or not viewers do. Allusions to events depicted in TNG, Voyager and Star Trek: Nemesis (the film franchise’s only box office failure) are important elements to the story, which displays considerable confidence that most of us are already familiar with Hugh (a character that appeared in only two TNG episodes), the malevolence of the Borg and the titular character’s relationship with pasty android pal, Data.


However, Picard is not a nostalgia trip and the series does a decent job succinctly bringing newcomers up-to-speed (though more explanation for Seven of Nine’s transformation into a kick-ass space vigilante would have been cool). For the most part, it’s warp speed ahead with a new story that takes place 20 years after Nemesis. Jean-Luc Picard (Patrick Stewart) has retired to his France winery, embittered by Starfleet’s decision to cease aid to the Romulans - whose star went supernova - and banning all synthetic life forms following an android attack on the rescue fleet (which also destroyed Mars).


"Sure, you've boldly gone where no one has before, but you can't cook for shit."

Then he meets Dahj (Isa Briones), one of two twins that are actually “synths” cloned from Data’s original programming (or something like that). But unlike Data, they are flesh-and-blood, capable of emotions and don’t initially realize they’re androids. When Dahj is killed by rogue Romulans, Picard is compelled to find her twin, Soji (also Briones) before they do. Without Starfleet’s help and permission, he hires a ship and assembles an eclectic crew to take him in search of Soji before the Romulans find her.


However the Romulans already know where she is: Onboard an abandoned Borg cube - known as the Artifact - where she is aiding efforts to restore former Borg back to their old selves. It turns out Romulans despise all synthetic life-forms and a radical faction believes a prophecy which warns they will destroy all life in the galaxy. Narek (Harry Treadaway) gets close to Soji in hopes of learning where the synth homeworld is. His sister, Rizzo (Peyton List), is impatient to wage a genocidal attack.


That’s the nutshell summary for a story that’s far more complex than described. Spread-out over 10 episodes - though I think ‘chapters’ is a more accurate term - the narrative is filled with plot twists, deception, conspiracies, spies and action, as well as a surprising amount of humor and poignancy. It’s a story that requires your constant attention and discourages skipping episodes, especially since it ‘s constantly revealing elements vital to the overall plot. But in the end, our time and dedication is rewarded by an intriguing story, slam-bang conclusion and bittersweet denouement.


"Well...it could use a few throw pillows."
Like classic Trek at its best, Picard’s greatest asset is its characters. Obviously, everything centers around Jean-Luc himself and Stewart does a remarkable job, not-only stepping back into the role, but depicting him as older, more vulnerable and disillusioned over what he sees as Starfleet’s betrayal of its own principles. While he’s the focal point of the show, Picard is surrounded by an extremely well-rounded batch of mostly new supporting characters, with a few old friends popping up from time to time. His “crew,” in particular, is unlike any we’ve seen in previous series, but all of them have unique personalities and fascinating back-stories (most with significant character flaws of their own). I especially liked Michelle Hurd as Raffi, a bitter former Starfleet colleague of Picard’s who’s battling a lot of personal demons, and Santiago Cabrera as Rios, a freelance pilot Picard hires. 

A few familiar faces return, but most are glorified cameos and only Jeri Ryan (as ex-Borg Seven of Nine) is an integral part of the action (literally). Despite all the obligatory nods to the past, Picard is forward-thinking, a different animal with a look and tone far-removed from previous series, including the frequent use of “colorful metaphors” once deemed archaic in Star Trek IV (one of the biggest laughs comes from someone imploring Picard to “shut the fuck up”). This is the best show CBS All Access has offered so far and plays even better on these binge-worthy discs, which are supplemented by a slew of great bonus features. 


EXTRA KIBBLES

“STORY LOGS” - Individual 3-8 minute featurettes for each episode.

FEATURETTES - “Aliens Alive: The xBs” (make-up effects for the recovered Borg); “Picard Props” (smaller props made for the show, many inspired by previous series); “Ser Me Up” (set design); “The Motley Crew” (casting the main characters, featuring interviews with actors and producers); “Make It So” (the story behind creating the series).

4 DELETED SCENES

GAG REEL

VIDEO COMMENTARY - The first episode features pop-up video commentary by the series creators.

STAR TREK: SHORT TREKS - “Children of Mars” (one of the episodes from the Short Treks web series; this one is relevant to the primary plot in Picard...though not essential viewing).

KITTY CONSENSUS:

MEE-OW! LIKE TAUNTING A MOUSE TO DEATH.